Hi there. I recently introduced you to Jimmy’s story. Here’s the next chapter telling you of my first meeting with him. Hope you enjoy it …
After a pupil has been referred to the PRU, but prior to the starting their placement, I always like to meet them along with their parents or carers and a representative from the mainstream school. There are a number of reasons for this. The meeting gives me a good opportunity to take note of how the child interacts, their level of confidence, their interests and their willingness to communicate. I assess them and they assess me!
Children who are referred to the PRU are usually very unhappy, show little positive emotion and have difficulty interacting with adults, particularly those they haven’t previously met. Quite often the child has no understanding of why they are going to attend two schools. Sometimes they have no knowledge that they have been referred to the PRU – nobody has bothered to explain to them what’s going on and there is a danger, that if they don’t have an understanding of the situation they will misinterpret the adults’ intentions.
Parents often have a negative relationship with their child’s mainstream school plus a skewed perception of the PRU and the work that will be done with their child. Some are understandably nervous and anxious about what is happening. I see this meeting as an important starting point in building a positive and trusting relationship with children and parents.
Schools frequently complain to me that they can never contact a particular child’s parents – they won’t answer the phone. Can’t they understand why? If I was constantly hearing negatives about my child (and believe me that’s pretty much all these parents have heard from school for a considerable time) then I’d be pretty reluctant to answer the phone.
As in any official transaction these days there’s plenty of paperwork to complete and reading matter for the parents to take home – I wonder how many of them read any of it? We then have a look round the PRU so the pupil know where they are coming, where the essential facilities are and where their classroom is located. Parents and carers benefit from knowing where their charges will be, and when the children chat at home about their day the adults can picture the environment. There is a great deal of reassurance offered to the child and parents that we want the best outcome for their child and for them to become happier and more confident at school. These meetings are generally very positive with the child being acknowledged for using good manners, eye contact and interacting well.
Jimmy’s initial meeting was a little different from the norm as he was referred as an emergency due to the breakdown at the mainstream school and the difficulties being faced by those employed to deal with him post exclusion. A permanently excluded pupil automatically attends the PRU until another school is identified, leaving no other option when Jimmy moved to Year 3.
The meeting was arranged for an afternoon just prior to the end of term. He came with his carers and was quite buoyant and excited about the prospect of attending a new school.
Jimmy immediately came across as a confident, open little boy with an inquisitive, questioning nature. He was beautifully turned out in the school uniform of the primary school recently identified. Jane and Andy, Jimmy’s carers, were very positive after the visit to the mainstream school as the head teacher had been so welcoming and positive, a new experience in their search for a suitable school. They had immediately bought the full uniform, and Jimmy was so proud and excited at the prospect of attending school.
I knew that I had to be gently assertive in my dealings with Jimmy and let him know the expectations when he attended the PRU. He had to know that I was in control of the relationship, but I wanted him to be confident about attending. I decided to use my usual approach of telling it as it is but in a way that is reassuring to the child, leaving no room for misunderstanding.
I introduced myself to Jimmy and told him that I would be his teacher when he came into my class after the summer holidays. I noted that he watched me and was listening carefully to what I was saying. I wanted to converse with him to assess his level of confidence and his language ability. Jimmy showed good language skills for a child of his age. He had to know that he was going to attend the PRU to practise good behaviour so he could go to his new school being able to be a regular year 3 boy who could achieve well in school.
I told him that he was coming to me to learn to be a big boy and do big boy’s work and he had to show me how well he could behave and work so that he could have visits to his mainstream school. He listened intently and assured me that he could do sums and he wanted to learn to read well. I went over his timetable with him and wondered what his reaction would be to having maths and English lessons each morning from the start of lessons until lunchtime. Jimmy appeared to be very eager, so to give him confidence I asked him a few simple adding questions and told him what a clever boy he was and that I knew he was going to do very well with me. I showed him the work he would be starting on, and we had a look at the library to choose a suitable reading book.
Jimmy’s carers were very impressed that he sat and listened and conversed with me so well. I understood their concerns; only that morning there had been a major incident against his two teachers and their worries had intensified about Jimmy’s future and ability to achieve anything in school. If he couldn’t be controlled with the ratio of 2 adults to 1 child, what hope could there be? After all, prior to the permanent exclusion, experienced teachers had been consistently unable to manage Jimmy – why should I be any different? Managing children’s behaviour is what I do. I do it very successfully every working day and my experience and confidence in my strategies told me that Jimmy would learn to adhere to school rules and high expectations of behaviour.
Having met and talked to Jimmy my gut feeling was that this was a little boy who was very manageable, and in fact I was very positive about him joining my class. I was aware of the many people who had tried and failed with Jimmy, and the many negative feelings about his ability to be managed. But I don’t give up on a child and know that unless there is something fundamentally wrong with them, which is extremely rare, effective behaviour management strategies will achieve positive results.
However, all these gut feelings don’t mean I am complacent. I don’t dwell on a child’s past and when they join my class – I consider a new start is being made but I know what each child is capable of, the behaviour they have displayed and have got away with in the past. Much of the unacceptable behaviour will have become habitual and steps have to be taken to manage the child to establish more positive, acceptable habits of behaviour.
So, how will Jimmy be when he starts after the summer holidays? I’ll let you know what happened next…
Please pass Jimmy’s story around to anyone you think may enjoy following his progress. Thanks for reading - Liz Marsden @ Behaviour Bible.